Lee forgot the Bee?
What Happened to Counter-Culture? is comedian Stewart Lee’s central question in the eponymous BBC Radio 4 show aired earlier this year. Naturally, the flower power focused programme features copious examples of beat poetry giving listeners clues to its answer. Ginsberg, Kerouac, Burroughs, the whole lot are endlessly recited.
Insect enthusiasts, however, were saddened to note the glaring omission of bee poets who – opposed to the beaters – were capable of rhyme, and formed an equally important part of the revolutionary 60/70’s zeitgeist. Not to disappoint our readership, we decided to publish and rank some of the most well-known pieces.
1. Respect - P. McCarthy
Bees, like ordinary folk
Are hardly seen
Working just as good as any bloke
But praise only goes to the queen
The queen (or equivalent beatle) brings sorrow
Yesterday, today, and probably tomorrow
But like a beetle, the bee needs respect
Respect, please
For I am the bees’ knees
Respect, respect
For both bee and beetle are in fact
Insect
Not John
For he is a bloody walrus
2. Mr Tamborbee Man – B. Dylan
Twinkle, twinkle little star
I once met a bee in a bar
I said: “Play me a jingle jangle
Your lancet hangs at an angle
Play me a tune,’’ but instead he stung
And so that little bee man never sung
3. Peace – J. Lennon
I believe in peace
Peace
And bees
Let’s be peaceful, yes please
Instead of fighting or going to wars
Let tranquillity heal our soul’s sores
I say let it bee
Let it bee
Time to oversee
That Harrison, Starr and McCarthy
Who harbor much passive-aggressivity
Hey Yoko, woko, doke
I’m a bee loving beatle bloke
But my beloved, one thing I love much more
And that’s peace, not war
4. Silent Buzz – Guru Meher Baba
….
5. Trees – Twiggy
What some see
Up a tree
Are birds and leaves
But frankly, very few bees
What’s wrong bees, scared of fame?
Is a bit of glamour too inane?
Well, the papz could wait you out
Chuck sticks at your hive,
Lay a trap of five, fill your microwave with trout
Come on and work those little wings
Model your yellow-black jacket until it stings
Give the papz their money worth and see
There’s more of you in that tree
6. Love – G. Harrison
Love is like proverbial honey from a hive
Like your chances, often hanging in trees
Stinging you all the time
When you tease too much, these bees
7. Sting – Sting
Guess there are many a thing
About which I, Sting, can sing
Like a desert rose getting trampled
Or a royalty lawsuit, for example
Those blokes really took a swing
At this bloke, called Sting
Well, if you then would ask me
If I’d rather be a honey making bee
I’d say at least all bees
Don’t bother paying lawyer fees
And those bandmates, the other two
I’d sting them until they’d no longer sue
8. Stayin’ Alive in the Hive – The Gibb Brothers
Some bros are bees
And some bees are bros
Dancin’ the night to free
Those little hexapod toes
Tapping away to a buzzing beat
That’s until one will sneeze
Spreading germs probably from wasps
Allergy, fear, panic, short-breath gasps
Buth whether you’re a brother, or a bee mother
You’re stayin’ alive, in the hive
One gets knocked of their feet
You don’t declare your defeat
‘Cause you’re stayin’ alive, in the hive
Ah, ah, ah, yeah, stayin’ alive, in the hive
Ah, ah, ah, sayin’ aliiiiivvveee in hiiiiivvveee
9. Ge-ston-ken – A. Warhol
Sting
Stung
Ge-ston-ken?
BILLBOARD!
Watch out
Rhyme is so contrived
When not from the hive
Bees make honey, not lard
Tried to paint one o' them fellas in pop art
But it felt little thrill
To sit patiently still
Too fast was the devilish bee
Stung me to bits with glee
10. The Real Star in a Bar – R. Starr
I was at Saturday’s bingo
And then went to the grocer's, then to a bar
And someone asked me, aren’t you Ringo..
Ringo Starr?
And I said, after a very long pondering hum
Yeah, that’s me, and I played the drum
Then he asked who was the greatest of all?
Was it John or was it Paul?
And I don’t know how this poem relates to the bee
But wouldn’t it be nice if for once it was about me?
That was the Top 10 Bee Poetry. This one was written by Jeroen. It's summer and we've clearly run out of stuff to write about; if you haven't, let us know.